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SEJ – Volume 4, Issue 9 – Mar 25, 1996

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SUCCESS EXPRESS JOURNAL
Volume 4, Issue 9 – Mar 25, 1996
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TABLE OF CONTENTS:

– LOL in the morning
– Tips from the Top – #14 THE PAST – with Wayne Morrison
– Book Review – THE RETURN OF MERLIN – Deepak Chopra
– SEJ’s WORLD – ACTION MATRIX – with Eric Edmeades
– The Cybergym Exercise of the Week
– Copyright © and Trademark ™ Information
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LOL, in the morning!

This week’s Humor Topic: The Psychiatric Hotline’s answering system:

“Hello, thank you for your call.
If you are an obsessive compulsive, please press 1 (repeatedly);
If you are a co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2;
If you multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6;
If you are a manic depressive, it does not matter what button you push – we probably won’t answer anyway;
If you are a paranoid/delusional, we know why you are calling, so please hold on the line (while we trace your call);

Thanks for calling…again.

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TIPS FROM THE TOP! With Wayne R. Morrison of Pinnacle Achievements

TIP #14: THE PAST

The other day I was speaking to a group of therapists, and I asked them how long it takes to get over the death of a loved one. About a third of the group stated with professional certainty “eighteen months”. (These people must have read the same text book in college.) I then asked them how long it took to gain closure on a traumatic memory. Once again I was greeted by a host of professional therapists with a precise time frame. I was shocked at how these people had specific answers for such subjective questions. This debate continued for a short while, and then I proposed my postulate which was not popular at all. Naturally, this excited me and I know I was on to something…

It takes no time at all to gain closure with ANYTHING in life we define as negative. Meaning, we can get over things instantly. How long we take to decide to get over these things still remains to be seen. For example, when someone finally ends their grieving for the death of a loved one, the transformation is instant, but they are ready to change.

From what I have observed in my treatments with individuals from minor depression to schizophrenia, there are 4 things that exist in our past, they are:

1) The events in our past
2) Our perception of the events in our past
3) The emotions we attach to our perceptions
4) The lessons we need to learn from past events

First let’s explore #1, the event in our past – they are irretrievable. When we remember an event, we are remembering #2, our perception of the event, not the actual event. Remembering the actual event would be impossible, because there are an infinite number of angles in which you could view the unfolding of an event that is occurring. Which angle you are witnessing this from event from will influence your perception of the event in memory. This theory can be ratified – Have you ever been reminiscing with family during the holidays when a family member begins to recall something that happened in the past, and then you jump in and correct them thinking that they are crazy, because it didn’t happen the way they remember it at all? After all, it happened the way you remembered it, right? Once again, all we can remember are our perceptions of the past.

Next, we have the lessons that we need to learn from life’s events. I firmly believe that everything happens to us in life for a purpose, and we must learn from those happenings. Have you ever witnessed a friend, or perhaps even yourself, reliving events throughout your life? All the while saying, “One of these days I’m going to learn something from all this.” In school, if we don’t pass a test, we must take the lessons over, so too in life. It is my thinking that once we learn the necessary lessons, then we can gain closure on this event, and move on with life.

The problem with learning lessons from the past is that #4, the emotions that we attach to our past, then the lessons we need to learn become increasingly clearer. Try this out for yourself, think of something from your past that is still unresolved, and focus your attention on what is most aware to you – the lessons, or the emotions. If you do this, I am sure you will find that the emotion is more intense.

Now if you are unclear as to how to reduce the negative emotions from your past in order to learn the lessons, don’t despair. There are many great therapeutic interventions out there. Some work more quickly than others, and no one therapy is for everyone. Begin searching for the methods of range that best resonates with you.

Until next week, take care, dare, dream, and make each day an epic adventure!

To Your Success,
Wayne R. Morrison
Pinnacle Achievements
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BOOK REVIEW – THE RETURN OF MERLIN – Deepak Chopra
Reviewed by Eric Edmeades

As you can imagine, I read a lot of books. I find myself regularly reading only personal development and success-related books, so every so-often I force myself to read some fiction. This week it was not difficult, because I read Deepak Chopra’s latest offering, and it is fiction.

Deepak is a very imaginative writer and tells a fun and enlightening story. The purpose of this book appears to be the teaching of many of Deepak’s beliefs in a format that makes it easy to understand: Metaphorical Fiction.

The story describes the ongoing battle between good and evil, represented by Merlin the Wizard and Mordred. It is wonderful to get whipped back into the world of enchantment that surrounds stories of King Arthur.

While the messages can be heavy at times, I would classify this book as a fun, light read.

Rating (fiction): 4/5
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SEJ’s WORLD, with Eric Edmeades

How do you take action? Specifically, how do you decide to take action? How do you decide what to take action on?

The best way I have found to decide where to take action is described by Dr. Stephen Covey. Dr. Covey relates the use of a “quadrant system”. You see, every action in life can be classified by these two things: the level of importance, and the level of urgency.

The trick is to decide how urgent and important certain actions are, and make the decision consciously. Many people (including myself) find themselves on ‘Auto Pilot’ during the day… and seem to accomplish a great deal. And then they realize that in fact, most of the things they accomplished were not the important ones.

Take sales people for instance. The reason that 20% of sales people get 80% of the sales is because the rest of them are taking action on things that appear urgent, but are not important; or even worse, are neither important nor urgent! For example, when I first entered sales, it amazed me that although we would all start work at 9.00am, many of us would not go to our first presentation until noon! That is three hours of doing things which do not relate to the primary goal of a salesperson – to sell! It may be having a coffee and a snack, or it may be washing the car, or it may be sitting around the office talking… in all those cases, these things have their place, but that place should be BEHIND the primary function, which is to SELL.

I used sales people for example because in their jobs they have a possible way to measure the level of success they are achieving. This behavior is true of many people in many positions.

The bottom line is that many actions we take in life appear to be urgent, but perhaps not important. The actions we should be spending our time on are the important ones; the ones that help us achieve the results we are really looking for.

So…seize the moment, and seize the day, to infinity and beyond!!
Eric Edmeades
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The CYBERGYM’s Exercise of the Week

ACTION MATRIX

This week in SEJ’s world we discussed Dr. Covey’s quadrant system for deciding where to take action. Here, in the CYBERGYM, we will take it one step further, the creating of an ACTION MATRIX.

For this exercise, you will need (now) a piece of paper, a ruler and a pen. Divide the paper into four sections:

URGENT AND IMPORTANT
URGENT AND NOT IMPORTANT
NOT URGENT AND IMPORTANT
NEITHER URGENT NOR IMPORTANT

If you are currently using a “TO DO LIST” please transfer all your “TO DO” to this new piece of paper, making sure to place each action in the appropriate quadrant of the matrix.

If you do not use a “TO DO LIST” please write all the actions you need to take this week on this piece of paper. Make sure that each action ends up in the right quadrant.

Once that is complete (please do it now) you have a list of your desired actions, and they are prioritized in a way which will show you which actions you ‘really’ need to take. For instance, you now know that you first want to take action on the URGENT AND IMPORTANT quadrant, and then on the IMPORTANT AND NOT URGENT quadrant.

One last thing to realize as you do this exercise is that you must be clear where an action belongs when you put it on the matrix. Remember that this is not just about work, it is about life. For instance, “working out at the gym” should probably be considered IMPORTANT BUT NOT URGENT, and depending on when you last spent time with your family, you will want to place that in one of the IMPORTANT quadrants. The long term job here is to work mostly from the IMPORTANT BUT NOT URGENT quadrant. If you constantly allow things to get into the URGENT AND IMPORTANT quadrant, you may at times feel ‘under pressure’.

This week you will be amazed at the results you create, assuming you have done this exercise, because otherwise this week will be like any other. Which is not so terrible, unless your goals in life require constant improvement…which I know mine do!

REMEMBER, “DO THIS EXERCISE BECAUSE IT IS URGENT AND IMPORTANT!”
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This publication is sent out, for free, on a weekly basis. Please honour our copyright. While this publication is sent out for free, it is not intended for ‘public domain’. You may post it to any BBS’s, newsgroups or forums provided you post it unchanged including any and all advertisements.). You may also, (and are encouraged) to manually forward it (unchanged) to people who you feel may have an interest in, or benefit from, receiving this journal.

(C) Copyright 1995-2009, Eric Edmeades

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Written by e2blogger

June 30, 2009 at 7:59 pm

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